Who Were You Before You Learned That You Are Supposed To Be Normal?

I am currently working through Paula’s wonderful book and absolutely loved this post.

Your Rainforest Mind

photo courtesy of Annie Spratt, Unsplash

“I have been trying to run myself on the do-your-best-to-fit-in-with-normal-people operating system. It’s not my original operating system. It’s the one I adopted when I was abused in various ways for being myself. I perfected it in school and at work, forcing myself to do all the boring and pointless things and to make myself take up less space.

What do I remember of the original proto-version? I was dreamy. I wandered in the woods. I read fantasy. I read entries in the encyclopedia. I loved puzzles and make-believe. I wrote stories and poetry. I did math for fun. I felt connected to the wild…”  ~BP

Who were you before you learned that you were too much and not enough? Who were you before you stopped singing, dancing, and asking questions with unself-conscious glee? Who were you before you learned that voracious reading…

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    1. You are very welcome Paula. I definitely fit the RFM criteria! Not surprised about the new followers as my own friends include an awful lot of RFMs. It is wonderful we can find and encourage each other here.


  1. This is so sweet and sad and touching. Sounds like a lovely book. Hopefully we come back to our inner child later in life when we are more self-assured, or if we are forced to because things are not working out. I embrace my dreaminess now.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. My counsellor tells me she sees lots of people in their 50s, especially men, who have spent decades dedicating their lives to jobs they hate, partners and families and then suddenly hitting a wall and discovering they are no longer being their true self and they do not have the tools or the energy to find themselves again.
      No surprise the suicide rate in men of my age is so high. I will not be a statistic.


      1. Sometimes it becomes a great tool for us if we find something like this and we can relate. At the least it shows that we are not alone and obviously somebody else had to feel like this. I’m glad you stumbled across it and that you are finding even more validation besides we already give you. You are one of a kind, a masterpiece, with all of your strengths and vulnerable bits. Your heart is of gold and rare. Shine on my special friend. So grateful to be your friend. Xo 💙🦋

        Liked by 1 person

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